Every time I had that acute pain in my chest, I would run to the doctor and every time get diagnosed with the same. Gradually the bouts of pain started getting more and more intense and frequent. I just continued taking gastric medicine, hoping that one day I’ll not feel this pain anymore. But the pain continued to get worse every time.
About 2 months ago, I got the worst bout of pain in my life. It was so bad that I couldn’t stand up straight. This time when we went to the doctor, he told us that he is unable to understand what problem I have, but it is definitely not gastric. We live in a small village in West Bengal called Alipurduar. There are no good hospitals there, so he advised us to come to Bengaluru for my treatment and we did.
In Bengaluru, we came to the Apollo Heart Institute. Here, upon running a lot of tests they told us that I have a damaged heart valve and that I need surgery to get better. There was no respite from the agonising pain I felt. Instead of getting a check-up done like we had earlier planned to, we had to stay back in Bengaluru for my treatment. When Rashid called to tell everyone back home what was happening here, he choked up. We had to tell our three kids; Serajul, Elias and Rumpi, who had stayed back in our hometown that we were not coming back soon as we had promised.
Talking to my children over that phone call is the hardest thing I have ever had to do. My eldest son, Serajul is 10 years old. He is too young to take care of his younger brother and sister. 10 years is not an age where you shoulder any kind of responsibility. My mother-in-law is taking very good care of them, but it makes me so restless that I’m not there for my children. More than anyone else, I am worried sick for Rumpi, my youngest child. She is just one and half years old and needs me all the time. I don’t know how they are managing without me. They haven’t lived a single day without me before.
Our lives changed with my diagnosis. Without the surgery, the doctors say I will not make it. The defective valve in my heart needs to be fixed or replaced for me to stay alive. My husband has been very supportive all this time. He got so stressed at hearing about the kind of treatment I needed and the cost of the surgery. He doesn’t have the money to afford my surgery. I feel horrible for putting him through this.
He works as a daily wage labourer and makes only 100-150 rupees a day. I know how hard we have to struggle to make ends meet at home. Due to the kids and now my health, I’m never able to help him with the family income. Within that small income we have to manage food, other important household expenses and my medicines and treatment.
My biggest worry is what will happen to my children if I don’t make it. They will be motherless at a very young age and they cannot look after themselves. I want to live, for my husband and children. I want to look after them and see them grow up. I want to play with my little girl, and dress her up in cute clothes and take lots of pictures with her.
My husband had to sell the only plot of land he had for my treatment. He borrowed some money from our friends and relatives but that is also not much. For my surgery to happen we need your help. Only your contributions can save me and make me go home to my children.
Please help us.